Wednesday, April 08, 2009

663.Round the Horn III


Yul exhaled as the setting sun. Rog inhaled as the rising dawn. Lips touching, parted, just breathing each other before the wonders of the cosmos of sheets warmer than before. Eyes shut as curtains before the stage of imagination, tongues playing as actors, darting to and fro, moving slow and quick, a touching of intent, a gliding beyond, beyond content. Sighs taken, sighs stolen, fingers searching, pulling hair as reins as necks bulged in sinewy shadows, lithe in desire, curved in reach. Hands spoke and fingers travelled, exploring nooks as scholar upon books as eyes followed lips in looks upon dives took; and taken.

Mairi cried the cry of frozen tears heard, not seen. Her face as stone in the rain. Her mind made up.

Kyra and Ariel danced in the light of the next life, master and apprentice, walking on rainbows, floating on clouds, kissing the sun with their eyes and tickling the stars with their toes. What had been given was to be given and so give it was with a natural joy, free as the breeze in the trees.

Von held his grandson. A name to give she had said. A son's wish she added. He beamed as a grandfather, holding lineage, holding a past and a future. His smile grew and Zoe smiled the smile of happiness shared, of a journey travelled to a successful conclusion.

Trev and Em, two cups of snizzle, one sheet of paper and eyes that said read. He didn't need to be asked twice. She found the spot between shoulder and chest, a nook to hear the heart she loved. He read as if floating, as if an audience of angels sat the seats of plush.

John leaned over the lave, door locked. The mornings were still hard. The memory still vivid. The pain almost unbearable. She was gone from sight, gone from touch.

2 comments:

Autumn Storm said...

Sigh. It makes me want to cry that here it was all alone.

A story chapter. If you had any idea how exciting it was to see a new chapter and then not having the opportunity to comment before now, and here is the thing, regardless of how nice it was to have visitors, to have the confirmation and to move into my new place, I couldn't help but wish much too often that it would all just go away and allow me the time to be here instead. But here I am now and my gosh, how glad I am to be here, reading this chapter once again, marvelling at the phrasing once again and rejoicing in seeing old friends once again.

There isn't anything original that I can say to the first part of this chapter. When it comes to scenes like this you are the undisputed master, stealing sighs (breath) in a way both like and unlike your characters. Creating simultaneous joy for the love and pleasure that they find in each other and desire to have what they have. Gorgeous expressions, rich in imagery, evocative and arousing, heart-touching and lovely as can be.

I absolutely love Her face as stone in the rain. Such vivid, descriptive language, from words she appears, a complete scene painting itself into the mind's eye as it is read. This whole passage is thoroughly intriguing, an incredibly well-written snippet!!

Just the thought of Kyra and Ariel together, dancing, in the light, floating, kissing, tickling, the warmth radiates from this passage like the sun coming down to touch the earth. So joyful to read, to watch.

Von. Bless him. Bless her. And the child. These are so very different yet each one captures the mood perfectly. The way in which you have written the opening lines of this part, the short, factual manner is so touching. Less is more and you have trusted a great space in which the reader is able to fill in the colours of the scene, the way in which their eyes meet, the way in which he looks upon his grandson, what flashed through his eyes, mind and heart as he was told it was Ceru's wish that he should name his son's son. This is one of the most special passages of the story so far.

Trev and Em, and your special touch which in this case is her special spot, a nook to hear the heart she loved, how utterly lovely, classically you, beautiful beyond anything that the heart can hold. I don't even know how to say just how.

And John. Following Trev and Em, and the bobbing of those that preceded. His aching heart and soul encompassing with its totality all who look upon him.

I feel like I have just read six chapters and I feel the need to thank you.

Trée said...

My dearest Sunshine, how I have missed you commenting on a story chapter. I too feel the pull of friends who have been gone too long. And with your comment, I miss them all the more. Thank you for coming along with me on this marvelous journey, which although is taking a sabbatical, is just waiting to reemerge all the better, all the stronger. You do give good comment. Sigh. And Sweet Dreams when you get that far. :-)