“John, can you read me.”
“Loud and clear Zeke,” replied John.
“Check your monitor. Can you ID this object? I’m zooming in now.”
“Zeke, that appears to be the remains of a Zael space station. We’re picking up a transmission and what appears to be a life form of some sort. Signal is very weak but your drone should be picking it up. Can you check that out?”
“Roger, moving in now,” replied Zeke. “John, I’m picking up that same transmission but the language decoder seems not to be working. Can you override this Vanguard’s system and patch me in to your signal?”
John hesitated. “Be just a minute on that Zeke.” Command had been jamming Zeke’s signal awaiting Ji’s consent. Timing was important. Rogers nodded. “Zeke, sending. You should have it now on channel 6.16.”
Ji mentored and taught like a master sculptor, and in this case, Zeke was his prized piece of marble. Just the right break required a hundred small hammer blows on the end of the chisel. From the outside, nothing appeared to be happening, and then, well, and then on the hundred-and-first blow, the perfect break. To the uneducated eye, it seemed that the last blow created the perfect break, but Ji knew otherwise.
The looped distress signal from 643 was one series of small hammer blows. The serendipitous arrival of the Raptors created several more. This transmission amplified the steady hammering, building to a break. Each event created stress, created opportunity. Yet, the stress had to come at the right pace. Not too fast, not too slow, but such that each event build upon the other.
The signal was faint. Reaching forward Zeke slowly turned up the volume. There were actually two signals, one loud and clear and another much fainter. The adrenalin from earlier in the day had worn off. But like a second wind, what Zeke heard . . . .
Command monitored his vitals. Heart rate up. Blood pressure up. Breathing became rapid. Untranslated, Zael language sounded like whales or even dolphins. The creatures were as peace loving as any species in the known universe and their language sounded more like relaxing music than urgent communiqués.
Zeke sat stunned. Tears rolled down his cheeks. His visor fogged over. Arms fell limp by his side. The Zael’s had not resisted. They went to the slaughter like lambs, knowingly lying down their lives before the Javalina onslaught, in the hope that a few of their kind could escape unnoticed. The attack had been merciless. The scale of destruction and wholesale butchery of every living Zael exceeded comprehension. To read about such things in history books was one thing; to hear the plaintive cries of children and babies were another.
“Sir, should we alert Lieutenant Zeke we have a clear feed on the second signal?”
“Proceed John.”
“Zeke, we’ve got new information on that weaker signal. Tune to channel 6.17. Tell me what you hear,” said John, his tone as somber as Zeke had ever heard him, which was saying quite a lot for a “blank voice.”
If a transmission could whiplash one, Zeke was there. This signal was not a recording. All indications pointed to someone, something that was still alive.
“John, what is the vector on that transmission.”
“Zeke, you’re two minutes away on a heading of 345.32S.”
What Zeke saw next turned his tears to anger. A baby Zael, fatally wounded was cuddled in its parents dead remains. Zaels, like whales, were huge creatures. Javalina gunships had ripped them apart with ease. Floating debris of this scale and size caused Zeke’s gag reflex to kick in.
Excitedly Zeke, hit his comm. “John, we need rescue vacs out here now!”
Silence.
“John, do you hear me. We’ve got a baby Zael that needs immediate attention. Over.” Zeke always ended his communication with “over” as a form of emphasis.
“John, damnit! Come in.” Zeke caught himself. Everything he had been taught about the gap was here, or in this case not here. Whiplash was the right word. And he knew it. Circumstances and stimulus had seized him like a bouncer’s hands on a drunk and rowdy patron. Taking a deep breathe, focusing his mind, he hit his comm. Again.
“John, Zeke here, come in please.”
John looked at Rogers for the okay. “I’m here Zeke.”
“John, we --“
“Zeke,” John’s voice broke ever so slightly, “Zeke, this little one is lost. Nothing we can do.”
No training on Hyneria had prepared Zeke for this. And the worst was yet to come. Ji sat in his private chambers monitoring events. He knew what was coming next and he knew the time was right for that final hammer blow. Perfect break or find a new piece of marble. He would know soon.
(to be continued)
Commentary Part 1:Commentary Part 2:Commentary Part 3:Reading: The Last Paragraph and Bonus Commentary:
70 comments:
Okay, something a little different. Title of next post before images (which are done) and prose (which is not done). What a tease, I know. :-)
This next piece will be the most emotional I've done to date. Not sure if I will find the right words today or not. Need to get my mind in the right place to do justice to what happens in this chapter.
Wow, sounds big, very much looking forward thereto.
I LOVE that word. :)
I do love the way it rolls off the tongue. If one can pronouce it correctly, well, then one has talents other than just the spoken word. :-D
A, I wish I could just do the audio for this posting and skip the written part. I know what I want to communicate and I think the commentary will be very good, but condensing this part of the story is presenting a challenge.
Best of luck with it, x, waiting in anticipation of both.
Hope you are having a wonderful day.
PS Hooray, I finally have sound! :)
That's great news A. I'm motivated to write this chapter now. :-)
Continuing the tease since the prose is alluding me at the moment, this chapter will have a minimum of three images. I may post the images to wet the appetite a bit more and create more guess work, but I don't want to be cruel. :-D
Or, I'm thinking of doing the commentary first and use that as a way to get to the heart of the text. Whatever it takes is the motto of the day. LOL
oooh love the teaser :0) can't wait to see, I'm breathless with anticipation LOL
Hope you are having a great day!
(hugs)
Mmm, maybe I'll post this in segments. The prose with the image, in three "updates." That way I can always stop with a "to be continued . . ." if I get stuck. How does that sound?
sounds absolutely torturous, I love it! LOL
Let's call it a WIP (work in progress). You guys will see the creation of a post, in segments, perhaps with major edits, as it happens. I'll post what is written so far. If you don't see it, it's because it's not been written yet. A true WIP in real time.
Expect some or all of a segment to be rewritten or even deleted as the rest falls into place. Heck, the final version might not look anything at all like these first couple segments. Sounds like fun to me. :-)
Just wondering whose epiphany it will be. I do enjoy hearing you narrate the story - but personally I love reading them along with the pictures as well. How ever you put it up, it will be savored Trée. Emotional? Hasn't every single post so far been such? Sheesh - you are worrying me!
Terry, this post will be a little longer than most. I could drag it out over a couple or three postings but I'm committed to the title and so by Janus we will wrap this up in this post. Might take me some time, but I'm ready for the Epiphany! LOL
Comments are welcome during this process. :-)
wow!
(said in hushed tones as Trace sits and waits patiently with popcorn, kleenex and anything else that might come in handy)
And I bet you thought we were done with Zeke and the Tragedy of Zael story. :-D
Remember, this is the critical mission that forever changes him. The brooch came from this experience. The stories Kyra wanted to tattoo on her forehead came from this event. And Zeke before and Zeke after were two different Zekes.
I do have to warn Terry. You might want to just skip this chapter. It's getting ready to get rather unpleasant for a bit.
Well, I can take my lumps with the rest of the crowd - I'm in it through thick and thin. Tracey, give me some of that popcorn - and please don't mind that I'm squeezing your arm too tight...
passing it along, you want some kleenex too, just in case :0)
Okay, maybe in four parts now. LOL Next bit of text is ready, but the next image comes just a bit later. Tear alert on this segment--don't say I didn't tell you. :-)
glad I brought Kleenex
I'm going to need them
wow
Zael language sounded like whales or even dolphins. The creatures were as peace loving as any species in the known universe and their language sounded more like relaxing music than urgent communiqués....The Zael’s had not resisted...to hear the plaintive cries of children and babies were another.
so heartbreaking
wow
did I mention that before
You know what this means, don't you..............?
How am I going to go to bed tonight?!
In*credible thus far, oh my gosh!
Images are perfect!
Okay, I'm thinking we leave the story here for today. It's getting longer than I want a post to be, longer than I think most want to read. Besides, this seems like a nice stopping point. :-)
Oh no, I just read A's post. LOL
Let me grab a bit to eat and then I'll do the commentary and reading for this segment.
Thanks for the kind words Sunshine. You do have working audio at home right?
:'o(
so sad, so inrcedibly good, you are amazing
love the fracs!
Thanks Trace. Now I want to go back and read the early posts on Papa Kyra and reflect on him as a grandfather with these experiences as he walks with Kyra on the beaches of Valla.
Chew faster!
lol, just kidding
Have my audio, ready and waiting to have those sexy tones emit and wash over me ;)
Seriously,
have a feeling you'll make us all cry with your commentary....
Okay, picking up the pace. Almost done. LOL
Should I skip dessert? ;-)
No, just save it for after :)
chew faster
Should I skip dessert? ;-)
ROFLMAO
I never figured you for a tease! ;)
Wonderful job on the commentary! Touched esp. by the parts on the crowding emotions and the baby zael.
As soon as my dogs chill, I need to do one more commentary part and then I'll do the reading.
Chicky, I have no idea what you are talking about. :-D
Thanks A. Stayed tuned for a little more.
Will do!
May as well stay up for the duration now :-)
haunting, yes it fits on the fracs
I don't know what to say, you have reached a new level with this chapter, the commentaries add so much, I am just overwhelmed, just stellar Trée
Thanks Trace. I felt more scattered on the first two commentaries. The third is much better. On the reading. My five minute time limit caused me to emit the last paragraph. If you feel a strong need to have the last paragraph, let me know and I'll record it, and then add 4 more minutes of commentary LMAO! :-D
like we aren't going to keep listening, yeah uh huh thats gonna happen :0)
the unveiling of zekes heart, wow
just phenomenal Trée
well yeah of course I want the last paragraph, you know I'll always want more :0) (and then I get more commentary too!)
Commentary #3. The confusion, that's the part that always gets to me the most, when I think of such things - not understanding, not knowing why! Oh gosh, I'm so spellbound by these commentaries, do keep doing them, they add so much.
Trace, just for you I'll do the last paragraph with a little bonus commentary--lol. :-)
why thank you so much kind sir :0)
First class job on the reading!!
Sunshine, you are too kind. I was reading it faster than normal trying to beat the clock. Maybe that's what I need to do--read faster!
So lessons tonight: (1) eat faster skip dessert; (2) read faster. :-D
That's exactly it though, faster meant you were not thinking so hard about what each sentence sounded like, if you don't mind me saying.
And as I've told you before, don't do 'kind', do 'honest' :-)
Not I forgot what I was going to say about this last part (last paragraph etc)...except to say I'm glad, we do know, he gets through it. I'm amazed at how you are able to tie up every end into the makings (incomplete as yet of course) of a perfect circle. Little fearful of what could be so bad...
Will you be writing that last part tonight (not that you haven't posted loads already)?
"love is truth"
Wow Trée, thank you (hugs)
not sure I'm ready for the next part, but since I know where it ends up, I'll just have to see it through :0)
just excellent sweetie, see I knew you had more to say :0)
A, thanks for your honest feedback. I will take to heart your advice on the next reading. No thinking, just reading. I like that idea. Let's see how it works next time.
If I do the next segment it won't post for another 4 hours or so. I need to turn my brain off and let it recharge.
Trace, be careful. I could talk about Zeke and Kyra and Ji for ages. But then, I think you already knew that. ;-)
and the worst part (or best depends on how you want to look at it LOL) I would just keep listening :0)
You'll get a kick out of this..
Trace and I were just discussing how almost rediculously addicted we are to the story and the characters etc.
Firstly, I'm sitting here in the middle of the night!
Secondly, Trace wants to set up a support group for when the story does finally tie up!
How's that for dedicated readership :-)lol
LOL yep, the white coats are coming after Autumn and I need to devolop some kind of patch or something ROFLMAO
Sounding like proper groupies now :-)
Sounds like we need some private sessions to deal with these issues. :-D
I do truly appreciate both of you for the dedication you have shown toward this story. I don't think I'm writing this if you guys aren't reading.
I need to stress the 'bringing all the many different aspects together' part, don't feel I said what I wanted to say - it really is nothing short of spectacular how every post ties together, the golden tree in the last, the brooch this time, all connecting perfectly (know I'm gushing, but I'm serious).
:-)
Maybe we need a convention, once a year. We'll let Trace pick out the beach. :-)
Everyone can come dressed as their favorite character. A, since you have the catsuit . . . :-D
:0)
Trée, all I can do is thank you for sharing this amazing talent you have with us. It is one hell of a ride :0)
Thanks Sunshine. We are getting to the point where I need to print out the story and reread some of the things I've said. This universe gets a little bigger with every post. :-)
Great idea! ;-)
Well, Trace, I'm all about the ride. LOL
Your voice has become more relaxed and confident Tree! BRAVO! It certainly brings a new dimension to your story Darlin'. :-)
The pictures are a bit haunting, but yet, there's a distinct beauty to them... I love it...!
Thanks Y. I appreciate the feedback. I hope like expensive leather, my voice wears well with age. I am starting to relax and not try so hard to do audio right, whatever that means. I do so look forward to your new recordings. :-)
Thanks as always sweetie for the very sweet and kind words. :-)
Of course, it is always my pleasure sweetie! ;-)
good morning sweetie, hope you have a great friday!
(hugs)
Y, words like honey to me. ;-)
You too Trace. How was your first day observing?
hey sweetie, hope you are having a great day!
my day was great, thanks for asking, I got to teach today YIPPEE, just part of a lesson but it was great! Just reinforced that I have made the right choice :0)
ooooh, chills. :)
You were right about the tears - I know better than to read this stuff while I'm at work. I read about the baby Zael, began choking up, and then had to answer the phone for a client!! Wonder what they thought when my garbled voice wouldn't work?
How does it feel to be a writer who can induce real emotions in your readers? Kudos Trée.
When I read back my comments they are always inadequate. This chapter still makes me cry today, just thinking about the commentary, not even having to listen to it again, does the same.
Below was a pinpoint to the day I fell in love with Rog. Kyra and Zeke, Grandma too, already lived in my heart and now Rog had his own special place too.
Post a Comment