As I glance into the memories of my mind, I see reflections rippling out in all directions. Some positive and good, some I'd rather hide from even my confessors. Yet, all have an elusive nature, no matter how hard I try, each memory evades my grasp as water does my clinched fist.
As I turn my mind left and then right, like the ripples in a reflecting pool, the view changes, the memory morphs, changes, unveils a new, recreated interpretation. I look closer and all I see is movement. Constant movement, nothing standing still.
Then, I hear a car blow it's horn. The light has turned green and I'm blocking traffic. How long have I been lost in thought? Don't know. Been driving at least 30 minutes, yet I have no conscious memory of the drive. Nothing. I remember getting in my car, leaving my house, but the rest of time has existed only in my head.
I wonder--how much of my life did I miss lost in my head chasing ephemeral charges of electricty and chemical reactions, believing they were real, that this was the matter of life. I had an appointment with life at the crossroads of here and now and I failed to show. Life happened and I was staring off into lala land watching the ripples in my mind fade into stillness.
All I got to say is you can blame Holly for this one. :-)
ReplyDeletewow what a brilliant post yet again Tre! I enjoyed every bit of it...thanks!
ReplyDeleteThis happens to me too, quite often actually...but I wouldnt have put it into words this magically...
Good on ya Tre!
Keshi.
Oh Keshi, you are a wonderful spirit that brightens my day with every beautiful comment you grace my blog with. Hugs and kisses my dear sweet girl. :-)
ReplyDeleteHow about if we hug Holly for it, the image, the words,-- its wonderful Trée
ReplyDeleteThanks Trace. Putting my own thoughts under an image makes me uncomfortable because I know what I know and I know what I don't know and the don't know list is much, much longer than the know list. I appreciate your kinds thoughts. :-)
ReplyDeletethats what makes it so good, is it is you, Trée, the known and the unknown, but still you
ReplyDeleteWell, it is me. Holly asked for it, so there it is. And where is that little trouble maker. She makes all these demands and then plays coy. Mmm . . . lol
ReplyDeleteTrace, you got that travelog up yet? I need some dolphins in my life.
we can all use some dolphin moments in our lives :0)
ReplyDeleteand no, I had a post ready to go and after having one of those clarifying moments in life this AM,
it got preempted by the post that is there
I'll work on the dolphin thing :0)
Or, you could just work on me. Just a suggestion. :-)
ReplyDeletenow that sounds like a lot more fun than working on the dolphin thing :0)
ReplyDeleteRemember, warm hands are a brownie point winner. :-)
ReplyDeletePlaid, of course, wins the jackpot.
warm hands - always, warm, soft, small and strong LOL
ReplyDeleteplaid - in my possession
Oooooh, white blouse, saddle back shoes, and pony tail too?
ReplyDeleteof course :0) what would plaid be without it. Don't forget the white knee high socks :0) they go with the outfit too
ReplyDeleteMmm, I was thinking plaid knee high wool socks with lace and tassels, kinda like what is seen on scottish kilts.
ReplyDeleteDid I ever tell you I love wearing a kilt and have many stories involving my kilt wearing days. Just don't tell my english lasses, ok? :-)
I have got to hear those :0) sweetie you can have whatever socks your heart desires.....ok there went fault #1, Trée in a kilt, oh my
ReplyDeleteI use to spend a month or so each year on business in Scotland. I was asked to wear a kilt to formal events and quite enjoyed the experience. Of course, I wore them in the traditional Scottish manner. :-)
ReplyDeleteof course you did, which really just fueled that imagination all outta control :0)
ReplyDeleteone place I have never been, but have always wanted to go. I have the most awesome picture of some scottish highlands in my office
The Scottish Highlands are beautiful and very, very peaceful. Never got the chance to go hiking there, my one regret. Had the location and trip all planned but business got in the way.
ReplyDeleteWonderfully written, Trée, poetic, seductive, flowing (no jokes).
ReplyDeleteThought-provoking especially following as it does Buddha's flower and so thoroughly inspiring in that sense!! You are so much closer.
Love the insight, and the fractal (think I see, what I'm meant to see;)
Monday morning hugs!
Any pictures of you in a kilt?
ReplyDeletemorning Autumn :0)
ReplyDeletey'all have a good rest of the night (Autumn, make yours a good monday morning), I'm off to bed.
thanks again Trée, for sharing part of you with us tonite :0)
Sunshine, thanks for those very sweet and kind words. I've got another on deck for tomorrow to warm the heart and return to the subject of love. Haven't got a title for it yet, but I'll add my two cents rather than a quote.
ReplyDeleteoh yeah, next post,Trée in a kilt, great idea Autumn :0)
ReplyDeleteNighty night Tracey, see you in the morning :-) Sweet dreams
ReplyDeleteWell, actually I do have some pics of me in a kilt. I don't have them in digital form, but we have a photo album with several pages devoted to my kilt wearing days. :-)
ReplyDeleteone word Trée- scanner LOL
ReplyDeletenight night
Mmm, talk about reflections in my mind. Those were some wonderful days and many great memories. Great saddness when that chapter of my life came to an end.
ReplyDeleteIt took me about 20 mins to write that very short comment (believe it or not!!! rediculous) - sometimes I find it hard to say exactly what I want to say and could have said so much more to this particular post (maybe later, after my buns are done and adequate coffee consumed).
ReplyDeleteYou are in all your postings of course, but it is also nice to hear your thoughts.
Am very much looking forward to this next posting
Sweet dreams Trace. I'll take that scanner idea under consideration. Don't hold your breath--lol.
ReplyDeleteSunshine, to give you a preview, the image is monochromatic in an amber color. The image itself is an elaborate heart design and the thought is to talk of love so enduring that a thousand years from now, archeologists, when digging, find a hunk of amber, and in the amber is my love. Well, that's the idea anyway.
ReplyDeletepardonnez nous, but according to my cultural sources, this traditional Scottish manner of sporting a kilt, didn't that involve NO UNDERWEAR? trust lisa to state the obvious, to go where no man wants to go...oops, wait, that didnt sound right...
ReplyDeleteLove that idea!
ReplyDeleteExcited to see. Wish there were more like you.
Lisa, you are correct. I thought they were kidding at first, but after a mixed banquet of scots and englishmen, and the scots decided to moon their counterparts, well, I never doubted again the traditional way to wear a kilt.
ReplyDeleteTruth be known, I would have worn mine that way anyway. :-)
how freeing!
ReplyDelete(no, not freezing...)
well, that's one banquet i'm sorry i missed...
ReplyDeleteLisa, I think you need to make a trip to Nashville so I can show you my personal photo album. Then we could have that coffee too. I love your spirit more with every comment you make sweetie. Hugs and kisses from my kilt wearing bod. :-)
ReplyDeletewoah, that other comment landed exactly at 11:11
ReplyDelete(even though its 12:11 here in toronto, north pole)
but apparently this 11:11 configuration has much cosmic significance...if y'all Google it, some of the explanations are pretty far oot, man! talk about
woo woo...!! i mean this was EXACTLY 11:11:00! wow, maybe i AM karmically enhanced...wait, let me check my manual.....
But are your hands warm?
ReplyDeleteahh, my spirit, yes...well, this afternoon my spirit went up to visit an old friend who has possibly a week or so to live...this man actually taught me jazz piano over 20 years ago and we have subsequently met again thru some of the woo woo stuff i have engaged in over these later years...anyway he found out that cancer is very aggressively and quickly ravaging his body and in the course of about 6 weeks has gone from fully functioning to what appears to be laying on his death bed, a skinny shadow of his former self, wanting to live, but perhaps his soul has other plans...its certainly out of all of our hands...so i went up with a girlfriend today and together we did some so-called healing work on his body and she played a beautiful small harp and sang lightly while i worked over and on his body...i also included his wife in the healing session which quite warmed her spirit and gave her much needed comfort, at a time when she is half out of her body with fear, and everything around seems so surreal... but he seemed to soak in whatever was needed during the session and seemed very much at peace and asked that we come back again. i was happy to give back to a sweet soul, friend and teacher who had given so much to others in so many ways...it was a little sad, i must admit.
ReplyDeleteand yes, my hands are warm.
ReplyDeleteLisa, that is a wonderful illustration of one soul reaching out to another. As you know from this site, fighting cancer is something very close to my heart. Many times, the real battle is the compassion we show to our brothers and sisters once we know the battle for a few more years on earth is lost.
ReplyDeleteI hope in my last days I have someone in my life like you. You did a wonderful thing today. Thanks so much for sharing.
Warm hands, what more can I say, but warm hands bring a smile to my face. :-)
ReplyDeletewell, i didnt mean to blurt it all out here on your site, and yet, in a way, that is a compliment to you, because you welcome any and all people very open heartedly and generously here, instead of just writing a bunch of impressive looking shit on a page and then running when it comes time to walking your talk, you show the many sides of yourself very openly, and engage very kindly with all others, and so i guess it makes me feel like i am safe to be myself here, instead of being ignored, or obliterated because i am not an acceptable enough member of some self serving spiritual academia club that uses the sacred words of others to not only rub each other with, but as some kind of intellectual competition...(god, it must be rant night, sorry...)
ReplyDeleteand so (pardon that outburst, i am so fed up with peoples horseshit its not funny)
and sooooo, thank you for providing that lush landscape and soft carpet to lay upon here...it makes it easier to open up to, what can i say?
Lisa, you are very welcomed here as are all others. Even those who have choosen to insult me on my own site out of ignorance are still welcomed here. I love them all, what other path can there be. And I love you too for you being you and I wouldn't in a million years want you to be any other way.
ReplyDeleteThere are many special souls that haunt this blog and I consider you to be one of those very special ones. The door is always open so please stop by, no need to knock. Help yourself to anything you want in the fridge and make yourself at home on the sofa or bed as your desires lead you in the moment. I'm at home either way. :-)
Lisa, if I could hug you right now I would. Your comments tonight have brought me great happiness. Thank you dear. :-)
ReplyDeleteand instead of always fighting cancer or having it be some kind of battle or war, perhaps more understanding can come as to the kinds of things that contribute to the spread of this disease in our bodies, things that arent always physical. from my 10 years of so of just dabbling in the alternative healing field, i have come to understand just how much our thoughts and feelings can create certain environments in our physical bodies...its actually quite incredible the connection between body, mind, heart and soul...in a way, i believe we can contribute to the breakdown of our immune system just from the way we see life, the unspoken thoughts and feelings that we do not feel free enough or safe enough to express can become trapped in our bodies until our bodies have to speak our minds instead...in a way we are already fighting ourselves, which creates a pretty unhealthy environment within our bodies...i'm not sure cancer is the enemy we need to fight, i believe it is one of the side effects of our stopped up, blocked, stifled feelings and thoughts....sometimes we need to think about stopping the fighting, the battle, the war....and learn to honour and love and accept ourselves as we truly exist, as the perfect beings we always were, not someone else's idea of the mold we will never fit into.
ReplyDeleteand learn to honour and love and accept ourselves as we truly exist, as the perfect beings we always were, not someone else's idea of the mold we will never fit into.
ReplyDeleteLisa very well said!
and no I can't sleep :0)
thank you Tree...you're a sweet soul
ReplyDeletewith a tender heart...
AND a sense of humour
(or humor, as y'all spell it!)
i dont know how to send cyberhugs
so i shall have to break down
and send one of my super deluxe
long distance energy hugs...
LOOK OUT!!! (sorry that was too loud...)
here it comes....
xo
Lisa, I have to slip into peaceful slumber, but I do want to say I think your post is dead right.
ReplyDeleteHugs and kisses my dear. You too Trace :-)
Oh, and Lisa, if you think my soul is sweet you should . . . oh, never mind. :-)
thanks Mer!
ReplyDeleteand apparently i cant sleep either,
a bit wound up from my day today...
well, you take over, if mr Tree hasnt
bit the dust and gone to sleepyland yet...
and have a nice evening!
should what...see your kilt?
ReplyDeletenut...!
nite, all you strange people!
ReplyDelete(i know, i should talk...)
good night Lisa and Trée, sweet dreams to both!
ReplyDeleteOMG. I can't believe you don't do this more often. You astound me!
ReplyDeleteLisa, I am sorry to hear about your friend. He is so lucky to have you there for him. Hugs...and lots of them.
ReplyDeletethanks Holl...to tell you the truth, i have only seen Brian (another one, i know!) about maybe 6 times in the last 20 years, but because we were both jazz musicians and he taught me when i was an older student at a college, and i found him in this weird dowsers group years later, we kind of kept our connection going. he's not really a close friend oddly enough, but someone i have always felt instantly close to upon seeing him, if you know what i mean. i suppose that makes it even stranger that i was so welcomed into such a sacred meeting with him yesterday. life's strange like that. and it was an honor to be able to spend that precious time with him. sometimes i think kindred spirits or souls just kind of "know" each other in that way.
ReplyDeletei was combing thru some books the past few days about death and why we might befriend it instead of fearing it...its an interesting topic! Good old Osho puts it into his usual friendly down to earth way, (i think it was one of his little books called Courage) and i found Dr. Judith Orloff, a gifted medical intuitive (buddy of Caroline Myss) has some rather lovely and easier to grasp insights around befriending death as well, in her book, Intuitive Healing...
what the heck are you doing up at 6am???
Plus, Holly, you must be magic...whenever you put in a special request for Tree, he rises to the occasion (dont you dare turn that into a sexual comment, Tree!) and challenges himself to go to a place he might otherwise not have gone to...yup, thats magic.
Holly, all you have to do is ask hon. :-)
ReplyDeleteHey, no one told me Holly was a practictioner of the non-white arts. Come on Lisa, you're suppose to be watching my back with this girl. :-)
ReplyDeleteGood observation.
ReplyDeleteThat is the way it is. We have very few moments of awareness. Mostly we just have imagination. I am trying to have more moments of awareness.
Again the fractal seems to match the text.
Thanks Beard. My experiences are very much the same. Much living in my head, little living at the crossroads of here and now. I really like this fractal in that I see the beautiful colors of a reflecting pool with the waves representing the memories of my mind. Thanks for stopping by again and leaving your thoughts. Much appreciated.
ReplyDeleteLisa - Men are easy ;-)
ReplyDeleteJust rub their belly and the world is yours.
mergrl - thanks for the hug. need them, want them...all the time.
ReplyDeleteTrouble maker? Coy? Moi???
ReplyDeleteCan you see I'm just now catching up on the comment thing. Gish.
Isn't that "moment of clarity" a doozy? Nice image - pleasant reverie.
ReplyDeleteThanks Terry. I just wish I had a few more moments of that "clarity."
ReplyDelete:-)
Bu thats okay..you got "lost in thought" going" within" for a bit.Maybe more need to do this in the world sometimes, "on the outside looking in"..just be careful of watching traffic and being a defensive driver!..;o) Its strange how we can drive and know what we're doing yet still be lost in thought like that sometimes. You can call it "zoning out" or "zoning in" either works for me..:o)
ReplyDeleteBlessings,
Rhiannon
Hi Rhi, so good to see you visit again. There is one 30 mile drive I've made two to three times a week for ten years. If I'm not careful, I can zone out on the whole drive and my body just makes the turns and gets me there. Quite scary at times.
ReplyDelete